Your Childhood Survival Strategies in the Workplace

Family Roles: Survival or Transformation?

Families are complex ecosystems where each member plays a unique part. In healthy families, children naturally explore different roles, sometimes the comedian, other times the caregiver. They're free to experiment, to grow, to change.

But in families where parents or caregivers struggle with substance or process dependencies, something fundamental shifts.

When Survival Becomes a Role

Children in families affected by dependency don't choose roles, they create survival strategies. Fear and shame become the architects of their behaviours. Each child develops a specific role so intense that what begins as a protective mechanism becomes a rigid identity.

These roles aren't just behaviours; they're survival scripts that follow clients into adulthood.

Understanding Your Origins

You learned early that your safety depended on reading the emotional landscape and responding accordingly to your caregiver's dependency patterns.

The four main roles show up in the workplace of course, we can't just turn them off as they've kept us safe so far. Which one might resonate with your work experience?

The Mascot soaks up all the tension and makes others laugh

The Mascot

The Mascot is the office comedian - empathetic, charming, and skilled at defusing tension with humour. They also soak up all the tension in the workplace.  But confrontation terrifies you, so you joke instead of speaking up, struggle with boundaries, and minimize your own needs to keep the peace. You're exhausted from performing, and people don't take you seriously when it matters most.

[Read more about The Mascot at Work →]

The Hero works hard to get it right all the time

The Hero

The Hero at work has it all together - high-achieving, responsible, and seemingly unshakeable. But underneath the success, you're driven by deep feelings of inadequacy and the belief that nothing you do is ever good enough. You're the first one in and last one out, can't delegate, and your worth is entirely tied to your productivity and others' approval.

[Read more about The Hero at Work →]

The Lost Child is invisible

The Lost Child

The Lost Child at work is the invisible one - quiet, withdrawn, and expert at staying unnoticed. You survive by blending into the background, avoiding conflict, and never making waves. In meetings you stay silent, your ideas go unshared, and you've perfected the art of being overlooked - but invisibility that once kept you safe now keeps you stuck.

[Read more about The Lost Child at Work →]

The Scapegoat pushes back hard

The Acting Out One (AKA The Scapegoat)

The Scapegoat at work is the one who pushes back, questions authority, and refuses to play along. You're often labelled as "difficult," "resistant," or a "troublemaker" - drawing attention and blame while deeper team dysfunctions go unaddressed. Deeply misunderstood and hurting, you may struggle with conflict, substance use, or self-sabotage that confirms others' negative perceptions of you.

[Read more about The Scapegoat at Work →]